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Guruage: Stooge Gum Arse Rage; Blind Women..
Do
I Know You?
Why
Are You Writing To Me?
Why
Work? Bears and Horses, Smells
Musical
Hounds, Love.
Exam
Tips
Train
Times, Personal Hygiene
Germans,
Christians, Old People, Bucks Fizz and more!
Bod,
Chaz and Dave, Birds and more!
The
Sky and The Moon Explained, Baby Fish
Just
Because You're Paranoid... Women Who Want It, Persecution of the Virtuous
Crabapples
The Metaphysics of Playing Cards
Salmon
Conundrum, Erection Evolution
Important
Issues
Yet
More Important Issues
Roommate
Removal, Poupon Poser
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Matthew Best wrote:
Why do only fools and horses work?
Dear Mr Best
This is because any one with any sense gets people to pay them to appear
to work, while actually providing charitable guru services from the office.
Yours in excelsis
Veitch
Hywel Davis wrote: Young Veitch, I must say I'm impressed in extremis
at the bare-faced wankery of your spunk which has enabled you to offer
said services to otherwise innocent peoples of this land. However one
of the questions I would like relayed to the masses is whether it is true
that the propensity of the grizzly bear to excrete is in any way related
to the coniferous nature of it's immediate surrounding? Also, is it necessarily
always the case that whilst it is a fairly simple procedure to coerce
your bog standard equine specie to any mass of precipitate, getting the
cunt to swallow is a different matter?
Dear Mr Davis
In response to your query, I am happy to say that I have been carrying
out extensive experimental research into both of the issues you have raised
in the above communication. If I may first address the issue of the defecatory
capabilities of the genus Ursa a propo the immediate vicinity or otherwise
of densely vegetated habitat:
I went to London Zoo yesterday, and clearly saw a bear laying cable in
its cage. Does a bear shit in the woods? Does it my arse.
Secondly, the relative ease with which one can coerce a steed to enter
the general vicinity of a quantity of the liquid H2O as opposed to enforcing
ingestion thereof:
I led a horse to some water yesterday afternoon. I found it to be a relatively
simple procedure to ram a tube down its throat attached to a high-pressure
pump and force it to drink over twenty gallons. You can lead a horse to
water but you can't make it drink? Like buggery you can't.
I hope that you are suitably enlightened.
Veitch
Matthew Best wrote: I like the smell, is this normal?
Dear Mr Best
No. You are sick. If you do not seek help I will report you to vigilantes.
I trust that this adequately addresses your concerns
Yours
Veitch
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Pigeons,
Robin Reliants, School Uniforms
Shrinking
Sperm
Crossing
the Road
Booze
Happiness
How
Long Is A Piece Of String, Question Question
Who
To Marry?
More
Important Issues
Surely
Not More Important issues
Particle
Physics Explained
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