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New
Foods Breakthrough, Survival Food
Levitation
Clothing
Breakthrough, Hat Magic
Trainer
Liberator, Pet Innovation
Aircrew
Safety Revolution
Meaty
Memory Enhancement Breakthrough
Pharmacy
Now, Beef, Abilities, grub
Road
Rage No More, Dead / Wash Breakthrough, Security Issues Addressed
Pet
Revolution, Odours Beaten, Fight Food, Turtles
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Meaty
Memory Enhancement Breakthrough
Ever spent a sleepless night wandering how on Earth you
were going to be able to measure the quantity of animal products you had
consumed in the previous 24 hours? I know I have!
NO MORE!
My groundbreaking new technological wonder will transform
your meaty memory shortfall conundra.
Simply wave the new MeatEat-o-Meter above your head, and
an instant readout of meat ingested over the last 24 hours will be blasted
out of it's 1500 watt tannoy speaker.
I have also developed a web-based downloadable version
to work with your pc. This is, inevitably, the E-MeatEat-o-meter.
I have also developed a particularly advanced version,
with remarkable niche market appeal.
This is a naval version, intended specifically for those
who require the device to work in native Ammerican-style shipboard abodes,
is capable of detecting specific ingestion of meat from tea, rather than
all meals, detects peas and has a diet alarm function to prevent excessive
eatage.
This is available at no cost to the consumer in it's downloadable
form, and is titled the
Free Sea-E-Teepee-Tea-Pea-Meat-De-Eat-O-Meter
With such a catchy name, this could be the start of something
big.
I envisage a marketing campaign for the MeatEat-O-Meter
picturing two lovers enjoying a scenic picnic on a beautiful tropical
beach, with this jingle provisionally entitled
An Ode to the Joys of a Meaty Repast Amongst the Wonders
of Nature
At lunchtimes I quite often am on
Picnics with my sex slave Sam on
Lovely beaches with some salmon
Ham and lamb and spam and gammon.
(with jam on)
Cut to laughing topless girl waving the MeatEat-O-Meter
over her boyfriend, with man shouting voice over (very loudly)
"Eat Meat? Meet the MeatEat-O-Meter! Every Meat Eater's
Dream Thing"
PS-I am looking for venture capital if any of you have
got any spare cash.
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